The Office: Season 8 --- "Battle of the Bands: Spotty Bananas vs. David and the Respectful Fonts"
“I know I'm a little slow on the uptake sometimes, but I finally saw the Y3 errata chart. I like it 147.2% better than the one for Y2. You have SUCH a better eye for things like this than I do. Just wanted to give you a ‘Good Job Dana!’ award.” – Ray
“Thanks! I like awards and it has been a while since I got one.” – Dana
“Well you're deserving!” – Ray
“I guess I prefer a gold watch to a nice ink pen, if you are wondering.” – Dana
“Really. Good to know. Not that I'll do anything with that information... “ – Ray
“It’s great that we can all work together as the body of Christ.” – Juli to Dana
“I’m the hangnail.” – Ray
Charity mentioned that her IM buddy icon was a spotty banana, to which Ray replied that he was in a band called "Spotty Banana" ...
"Hey, that 404's. Someone should fix it. Wait, that's me" - Ray, on Charity's message that there was a broken link.
"RAAAAY!! My banana will yammer sternly at you if you do not make happy non-404 noises presently" - Charity
"Stanley Yammer is the lead guitarist for my band, Spotty Banana." - Ray
Later:
"I'm totally seeing a battle of the bands between Spotty Banana and
David and the Respectful Fonts!!!" - Juli
"Everything that has a picture or looks nice is David's work." - Ray
“Amy is getting her lunch. This is tremendously convenient for yours truly.” – David
“You’re supposed to be sleeping” – David to Christy, who is cat-napping on the office floor
“I’m stretching” – Christy
“Slumber dear maid. Green boughs will cover thee” – David, quoting an eighteenth century English song
“Prove it.” – Christy
“Mom, I need to go outside and cut some green boughs now.” – David
On the Computer Mouse
“I hate a weak mouse. Weak mice need not apply.” – Mom
“We will not tolerate weak mice in this office. There will be fewer but better mice.” – David, playing off of a flick called Ninotchka
“Hi. My son is six. Is he too young to apply for the chief advisor position?” – Ray, completely randomly, to Christy on IM one morning
“That all depends. He could be chief advisor to a snail.” – Christy, going with it
“That'd work. Should he fax his resume?” – Ray
“I bet the embassy would take it.” – Christy
“SCOTT JOHNSON
WORK EXPERIENCE
None.
REFERENCES
Mommy and Daddy.” – Ray
“Brilliant. I’m sure the snails will get back to him promptly. They’re polite that way.” – Christy
”So I've heard.” – Ray
“My role models: Matthew (from Anne of Green Gables), the stick figure guy, Sam Gamgee, and the octopus from Oktapodi. None of my models particularly trend towards intelligence, now that I think of it.” – David
“Oh, Christy! Now I know what coquette means! I always wondered, you know, in Enchanted, ‘You are my one coquette.’ I always thought he was talking about an egg.” – Lauren, reading Christy's notes on Les Miserables.
“You get a live animal for your first-year anniversary of working here.” - David
“I want a bunny!” – Amy
"Christy, make a note, Amy gets a bunny. It has to be larger than a rodent though.” – David
"I want a pirahna" - Lauren
“’Cause I would have paid money to see Amy in a turban” – David on the recent Saladin caper and Amy’s tragic absence from it
“You get a gold star.” – Mom to Christy
::Insert indescribable sound of envy and protest from Lauren::
“Wow, that’s the first time I’ve ever heard Lauren have a bad attitude.” – Amy
“I’m just tired of being the only one who ever throws a temper tantrum” – Amy
The natives are getting restless. After all, it is the middle of Unit 2 nine-week insanity. Suddenly, a primitive cry goes up:
"Davy has to go get us Starbucks!" - Mom
“STARBUCKS! STARBUCKS! STARBUCKS!” – Amy, Mom, Brittainy, Lauren, and Christy
"I have to finish these pictures! Brittainy, do you want me to finish these or go get Starbucks?" - Davy, trying to be responsible
"Go get Starbucks" - Brittainy
"You weren't supposed to say that." - David
“Everybody IM David and tell him to go get us Starbucks!” – Mom
“He’s just gonna turn off his IM… see?” – Christy
The madness continues: David is now playing “Causi, Causa” from A Night at the Opera, a Marx brothers movie, and Mom has co-opted a salaried person from Production to go fetch Starbucks because we’re all too busy to go.
"I never said that Brittainy couldn't chant!" - Christy
“Thanks! I like awards and it has been a while since I got one.” – Dana
“Well you're deserving!” – Ray
“I guess I prefer a gold watch to a nice ink pen, if you are wondering.” – Dana
“Really. Good to know. Not that I'll do anything with that information... “ – Ray
“It’s great that we can all work together as the body of Christ.” – Juli to Dana
“I’m the hangnail.” – Ray
Charity mentioned that her IM buddy icon was a spotty banana, to which Ray replied that he was in a band called "Spotty Banana" ...
"Hey, that 404's. Someone should fix it. Wait, that's me" - Ray, on Charity's message that there was a broken link.
"RAAAAY!! My banana will yammer sternly at you if you do not make happy non-404 noises presently" - Charity
"Stanley Yammer is the lead guitarist for my band, Spotty Banana." - Ray
Later:
"I'm totally seeing a battle of the bands between Spotty Banana and
David and the Respectful Fonts!!!" - Juli
"Everything that has a picture or looks nice is David's work." - Ray
“Amy is getting her lunch. This is tremendously convenient for yours truly.” – David
“You’re supposed to be sleeping” – David to Christy, who is cat-napping on the office floor
“I’m stretching” – Christy
“Slumber dear maid. Green boughs will cover thee” – David, quoting an eighteenth century English song
“Prove it.” – Christy
“Mom, I need to go outside and cut some green boughs now.” – David
On the Computer Mouse
“I hate a weak mouse. Weak mice need not apply.” – Mom
“We will not tolerate weak mice in this office. There will be fewer but better mice.” – David, playing off of a flick called Ninotchka
“Hi. My son is six. Is he too young to apply for the chief advisor position?” – Ray, completely randomly, to Christy on IM one morning
“That all depends. He could be chief advisor to a snail.” – Christy, going with it
“That'd work. Should he fax his resume?” – Ray
“I bet the embassy would take it.” – Christy
“SCOTT JOHNSON
WORK EXPERIENCE
None.
REFERENCES
Mommy and Daddy.” – Ray
“Brilliant. I’m sure the snails will get back to him promptly. They’re polite that way.” – Christy
”So I've heard.” – Ray
“My role models: Matthew (from Anne of Green Gables), the stick figure guy, Sam Gamgee, and the octopus from Oktapodi. None of my models particularly trend towards intelligence, now that I think of it.” – David
“Oh, Christy! Now I know what coquette means! I always wondered, you know, in Enchanted, ‘You are my one coquette.’ I always thought he was talking about an egg.” – Lauren, reading Christy's notes on Les Miserables.
“You get a live animal for your first-year anniversary of working here.” - David
“I want a bunny!” – Amy
"Christy, make a note, Amy gets a bunny. It has to be larger than a rodent though.” – David
"I want a pirahna" - Lauren
“’Cause I would have paid money to see Amy in a turban” – David on the recent Saladin caper and Amy’s tragic absence from it
“You get a gold star.” – Mom to Christy
::Insert indescribable sound of envy and protest from Lauren::
“Wow, that’s the first time I’ve ever heard Lauren have a bad attitude.” – Amy
“I’m just tired of being the only one who ever throws a temper tantrum” – Amy
The natives are getting restless. After all, it is the middle of Unit 2 nine-week insanity. Suddenly, a primitive cry goes up:
"Davy has to go get us Starbucks!" - Mom
“STARBUCKS! STARBUCKS! STARBUCKS!” – Amy, Mom, Brittainy, Lauren, and Christy
"I have to finish these pictures! Brittainy, do you want me to finish these or go get Starbucks?" - Davy, trying to be responsible
"Go get Starbucks" - Brittainy
"You weren't supposed to say that." - David
“Everybody IM David and tell him to go get us Starbucks!” – Mom
“He’s just gonna turn off his IM… see?” – Christy
The madness continues: David is now playing “Causi, Causa” from A Night at the Opera, a Marx brothers movie, and Mom has co-opted a salaried person from Production to go fetch Starbucks because we’re all too busy to go.
"I never said that Brittainy couldn't chant!" - Christy
posted by Praelucor at 2:51 PM
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