The Office -- Season 8: "Eutychus on the 17th"

I realized that I'm showing up a lot in this particular quote list, which is unusual. I can only conclude that it's because my office mates aren't giving me sufficient material. Ray, where are you when I need you!?!?!

“That’s it! That’s our image! A woman kneeling in a turnip patch in the middle of the Civil War, eating turnips and throwing up!” – Mom
“The Turnip Sale! I’ll start sketching some concepts.” – David

“Wow, this does taste awful. Well, the point of PEZ isn’t the taste, is it?” – David
“No. Never was.” – Brittainy

“I was utterly befuddled” – David about not being able to remember Judy Garland’s name

“I don’t back up people who threaten me with comforting songs!” – Amy to David

“Actually, there’s a lot I could tolerate if it would annoy you…” – David to Amy

“What was the name of the kid who fell out of the window in Acts?” – David
“I dunno but I can look it up.” – Christy
::Several seconds pass::
“Eutychus.” – Christy
“Thanks.” – David
“What do you want it for?” – Christy
“We’re looking for a name for this [project].” – David
“Why do you want to call it [the project] ‘Eutychus’?” – Christy to David
“Well, I said the phoenix and Dad said we could be more biblical.” – David

“And now you made it fat.” – Christy, commenting on the bird David is designing
“A fat bird is a cute bird.” – David
“It looks dumb.” – Christy
"It so doesn't." - David
::Time Passes::
“I do not accept that phoenix. It’s fat and it looks like a robin.” – Christy to David

“Show me.” – Christy
“No.” – David
“C’mon, show me!” – Christy
“No!” – David
“May I remind you that I share my food with you?” – Christy to David
“Yes but… but… oh, all right. I feel so dirty for giving in to you.” – David to Christy

Dana on IM: “That's all! Brilliant, you are, old chap!”
Christy on IM: “Wow. Um, thanks old chap.”
Christy to herself: "Is that my Dana?"

“What a relief to know that I’m not unnaturally perfect” – David

“Awww… I was engaged on the same day as Spurgeon!” – Lauren
“When was it?” – Christy
“June 10th.” – Lauren
“Oh, bummer. I can’t follow suit; I have to get engaged on the 17th.” – Christy
“Um, why?” – Lauren
“Because everybody in our family gets engaged on the 17th. Mike was September 17th; David was November 17th. I guess, in order to keep the pattern perfectly, I’d have to get engaged on January 17th.” – Christy
“Like you can control it.” – David
“Sure I can. It’s very simple. I just say, ‘You can ask me to marry you whenever you want, but I won’t give you an answer unless you ask on the 17th.’” – Christy
“Oh sure you would. What if you were madly in love? Do you really think you’d do that?” – David
“Yes I would! Well… or Dad can make it a condition of agreeing to let him ask.” – Christy
“What if he comes to Dad on the 18th of January! Are you going to make him wait a whole year less a day!?” – David
“I’m not that picky about the month. It would be nice, but it doesn’t have to be that way so long as it’s the 17th. The traditions must be preserved.” – Christy
“What if he’s got a tradition of fasting and praying for the nations on the 17th of every month! What’s he going to do, call you between morning and evening prayers? Take you out to dinner and say ‘I really love you, but I can’t eat with you?’” – David
“I wouldn’t want to be proposed to over dinner anyway.” – Christy